After being in the mountain village in Albania, our next country was Kosovo. Kosovo is very small country south of Serbia. Kosovo was also a continued ATL month for my team and I which we ask the Lord where he wants us to go and who he wants us to speak to. We met many amazing people, including a man who was translating the Quran into Turkish. He had incredible stories about his life and his family, and we were able to have many intellectual conversations about religion, and faith. We also formed a connection with a coffee shop run by a brother and sister who are both Muslim. We had very beautiful conversations about the Bible, Holy Spirit, Trinity, Muhammad, prayer, and the Quran.
As much as they were beautiful, it was also extremely hard to leave that conversation without them accepting Jesus. After every conversation with a Muslim, I would cry. Like the first step out of the door and out of sight, I would break down and weep. Ugly tears and snot. I asked the Lord what was going on when that started to happen every time. He reminded me of what I prayed for at my training camp: EMPATHY. I prayed to have more empathy. There were days where I wished I didn’t pray it. God was allowing my heart to break for these people and what they were going through. I felt them. I cried over their salvation for these strangers the same way I have had for my brothers. I would be in the middle of the conversations wishing they would accept Christ right here and now. However, the cost to follow Jesus for them was far greater than my cost.
I babysat for a family in a church we found so they could go to a friend’s funeral. The friend who passed was a converted Muslim. His family disowned him, he lost his friends, his job and was beaten up. Literally he was beaten to the ground because he accepted Jesus. He died from cancer without ever hearing from his family again. Yet here I am, about to watch children and I am hearing this story and I am weeping. The cost for them was far greater than it ever was for me. I got a little judgement and some passive remarks from family, lost a couple of friends, and didn’t party in high school. I was never once beaten or had my life threatened. The fact is, it can and needs to take a lot more time than just one conversation from a 20-year-old girl from Florida. It was very convicting. To almost be impatient they weren’t saying yes to Jesus when their sacrifice will be far greater than what I have ever had to give or will ever give.
I went on from that story encouraged. I don’t rush the Holy Spirit and I don’t rush what these people need. They need dreams and visions; they might need years of conversations and questions. I was honored to be used by God in their uncovering of truth. It may take years and years, but I do not have to see the result to know and trust that God is working and pursuing them.
I’m grateful the Lord has allowed me to weep the way he does for his children who are far from him. I got a very small taste of God’s heart and that was worth everything, to understand more of God and his character is all I want.
PHEWWWWWW! that was beautiful.
this is amazing, thank you
So thankful you prayed for empathy and you are receiving it. Sounds hard- essentially getting a broken heart many times over. Grateful you were there to have those lovely conversations- sounds like many seeds were planted!
I’m so proud of you! God says to share His Word, and you are! The Holy Spirit will lead you and guide you, and put people into your life that He’d have you minister to! You are planting seeds! You are making a difference! Even if you don’t know it today, God will use this time for His glory! His Word does not come back empty! ??????????
Isn’t it nice to know crying isn’t necessarily a bad thing? Actually, is it ever a bad thing?
Whew,…sure am glad you’re not blaming that sensitivity thing on your earth dad… it’s okay to cry at movies too you know : ) Stay Safe! and sweet.