Countries and I, Strangers and I, Heaven and I

This last blog to me feels like the last page of a book. We know the ending already, the climatic part is over, the resolution has happened but you still need that last page, that last paragraph, that last sentence to say you finished the book. Smart people call it an Epilogue. 

It is also a “Thank You” blog. A thank you to those who supported me financially, emotionally, spiritually, and prayerfully to go away and experience the Lord and his lost people for 11 months. I feel forever indebted to you because of what I got to receive and take away. I get even emotional now thinking about how my life has changed because of this trip and how the Lord met me and used me. That would have never have happened if it wasn’t for your belief in me and your generosity. Thank you. Thank you so much for letting me experience more of God.

I miss the early mornings of communal breakfast and worship. I miss the coffee check ins with my teammates. I miss trying weird food and mis-pronouncing everything. I miss being exhausted from the ministry days and being out on the field. I miss saying things like “out on the field”.  I miss the different cultures and traditions. I miss the mosques and the muslim people. I miss the travel days and the sleep deprivation. I miss smelling like different countries. I miss washing my clothes in a bag. I miss eating chicken and rice 4 days a week. I miss the simplicity of it all. I miss the complexity of it all. It feels like I got home yesterday but yet it also feels like all of that was 10 years ago. To say the least, It’s weird. 

The classic question of, “How was your trip?” has been asked and I have finally mastered the answer. To simply put, The World Race cultivated the most intimate relationship I have ever had with Jesus, challenged me in how I value community and people, and grew me in how I evangelize and disciple the people I meet. 

 “Intimacy, Community, and Mission” was what the World Race was all about, and I have taken their slogan to heart and brought it back to good ole Niceville Florida and to my life today. 

God kindly opened ministry for me to be the Student Minister Associate at my home church(Crosspoint) for High School and Middle School in which my number one role is to disciple and teach. ITS THE LITERAL DREAM. I feel in line with the heart of God and his will in this season. It gives me a great peace and extreme passion. 

It all makes sense now, I was told time and time again by my teammates on the race that the “Lord was preparing me well” for the next season of my life not only to be a wife but for my future ministry. BOY WERE THEY RIGHT! THANK YOU GOD! THANK YOU WR FRIENDS! Im now a fiancé to THE PARKER WHITE and I’m trying my best to imitate Christ and make disciples who will make disciples. I have taken just about everything I learned from the Race and was able to apply it ALL within a month of being home. NOT KIDDING. We’re talking sabbath, spiritual disciplines, listening to the Holy Spirit, spiritual gifts, repentance, reconciliation, evangelizing, conflict and resolution, feedback, being bold in prayer and healing, communication, teaching, listening, and MORE! These things have been taught to me over the course of a year and I saw all of it come together in place in 30 days of being back in America and it’s continuing. 

I have been far from perfect though even with everything I learned. I’m still and will always be learning and correcting myself to be more like Christ. This is NOT a “I went on a mission trip so I know more now”. Please don’t mistake this to mean that. This is not that, but what I’m trying to say is that I see why God had me go through the things that I did so that Im ready for right now and for that, I am grateful. 

I feel covered and protected by my Father. I feel seen by Him, I feel known by Him. He is faithful and kind. The Lord has prepared me and is preparing me even now for what is to come. He has prepared you and is preparing you too. 

Lastly, I am reminded that He has more. It’s hard to go through all the highlights of the world race and the memories in my head and think my life is going to get better than that. BUT YET HE’S GOD. He is all consuming and never ending, there is so much more of him that I haven’t experienced that he will invite me to discover and you as well. There will never be a stoping point. That used to sound exhausting to me but now it’s just exciting to know that there is more for Him and I, there is more for our ministry, there is more for Parker and I, there is more for my family and I, my friends and I, strangers and I, countries and I, Heaven and I. 

I look forward to saying yes to His future invitations knowing that what he has for me is good. It will always be good.  He is always good. 

Thank you for letting my write one last time to you on this platform. I’ll always have more words and more thoughts, I’m sure of it, but it just won’t be on here. 

Thank you again to my supporters. 

Thank you to my family, my mom, my dad and my siblings. 

Thank you to my world race friends. I miss every single one of you, deeply. 

Thank you to Gina for being constant and consistent and always letting me repent. You walk a beautiful walk of your heart and mercy.    

Thank you to Denny for believing in our friendship and being the strongest person I know. Thank you for teaching me reconciliation and freedom. 

Thank you to Zach for always giving me honesty, humility and extreme amount of grace. 

Thank you to Anthony for always freaking challenging me all the freaking time on every freaking thing. I am deeper in my convictions because of it. 

Thank you to April for showing me how to be show reverence for the Lord. 

Thank you Reynaldo for showing me what it means to be a friend of Jesus. 

Thank you Bailee for helping me laugh in my hardest moments. 

Thank you Bradon for never letting me take anything too seriously and for TALKING CRAP. Thank you for knowing you identtiy in Jesus. Thank you for sharing your testimony. It still gets me. 

Thank you Brett for leading me in humility. 

Thank you Chris for showing me more of the Holy Spirit. 

Thank you Natalie for showing me true kindness and gentleness. 

Thank you Claran for your vulnerability and honesty. I value it still today. 

Thank you Derek for being a man of integrity. ALSO FOR BEING HILARIOUS.

Thank you Emily for being a woman of dignity and a caring friend. 

Thank you Elizabeth for your fiercest prayers and what it looks like to be still with the Lord. 

Thank you Issak for your knowledge but more for your empathy and understanding. 

Thank you Madison for your discernment of the Holy Spirit. You are great at that. 

Thank you Joanne for your tenderness. Your joy was infectious. 

Thank you John for your endurance and strength. Also for your good taste in food and drinks. 

Thank you Madison Busey for your creativity and beautiful perspective on life. 

Thank you Kaitlynn Heil for your friendship, support, feedback and trust. You made me better. 

Thank you Kaitlynn May for your powerful healing prayers and incredible advice and teaching abilities. 

Thank you Katie Abbot for seeing people the way the Lord does. It is a gift and I look up to you. 

Thank you Lee for doing what is right and what is good. Thank you for always caring. 

Thank you Michael for challenging me and correcting me. Thank you for your truth and passion. 

Thank you Renee for being an inspirational leader and for always convicting me when you spoke. Thank you for how you stewarded your relationship with Christopher well, it ministered to me.

Thank you Taylor for being gentle to me and always considerate of me.  

Thank you Tiffany for abiding in the Holy Spirit and never backing down. 

Thank you Drew for leading me from a deep relationship with Jesus. 

Thank you Nicey for always speaking life and truth. 

Thank you Jordan for being an open ear and a caring person for people’s souls. 

Thank you Josiah for good soup and insane spiritual insights, and for being a man of good character and kindness. 

Thank you Hannah for showing me how to handle disappoint in a Godly way as well as lead from a place of submission to Jesus. 

Thank you Chris Huffman for your constant pursuit, you replicated Jesus’s heart. 

Thank you Darla Huffman for the mama bear love and hard truths but good truths. 

 

Thank you to Ari McMonagle, my mentor in that season, a caring presence, a woman of empathy and compassion, deep strength and resilience. Thank you for listening to the Holy Spirit and being obedient. Thank you for teaching me to become more like Jesus. That was everything for me. My World Race would not have been what is what without your guidance and wisdom. Thank you for holding my tears and my messy parts in the most delicate ways. Thank you for being a door opener to God’s throne room.  

Lastly, but most importantly, Thank you for Parker White for choosing me and loving me well in the challenges and heartache of long distance. Thank you for giving me unconditional and sacrificial love. Your sacrifice to me was great and much that others never saw. I saw the sacrifice and I see it now. Thank you for working and providing for us. Thank you for giving me a home to come back to, both metaphorical and physical. They are both on a solid foundation, only one of the homes with slanted floors ;). You are my best friend and the best teammate. Thank you for replicating to me what Jesus is to the church. It is my greatest honor to be your bride for the rest of my life. I love you. 4 now and 4 ever.